And Speaking of Martha....

What do you imagine her stay in prison was like?! I mean, I cant picture Martha doing the typical prison things, like lifting weights, getting a tat, or making someone her bitch.... so what exactly do you think she did in jail?!

The obvious answer in my mind is that she did exactly what she did on the outside world, and busied herself with domesticating her surroundings with annoyingly inventive takes on everyday items.

Picture it: Prison Living with Martha Stewart.

Of course, she had to work with what she had in prison, so I imagine the show revolved around things like how to spruce up that dingy old cell. By day, use your blanket to double for a lovely wallhanging to break up the monotony of a brick wall. And just think of what you can do with the lunch scraps most people throw away! By saving the rinds from your lunchtime orange, you not only cut down on the amount of waste that is going into our country's landfills, but youve also got a great way to combat that pesky urine odor.

If you think about it, Martha is kinda like the domestic MacGuyver. And, I gotta say, anyone who can turn trash into a stunning centerpiece or a method of survival, is truly a gifted individual. But, the episode of Prison Living with Martha Stewart that I wish I could see is the episode where she shows everyone how to turn that empty toilet paper roll into a shank. Waste not, want not!

Come to think of it, that great prison poncho Martha made really was the perfect place to hide said shank. Hmmmmm....